No life rafts here.

Unemployment in 2013 is looking pretty bleak. It’s been a roller coaster so far. The process of skimming various sites for openings and reading over job descriptions and qualifications. Tailoring resumes to suit the different availabilities.

I hear a lot of things. Over-qualified. Under-educated.

Your experience isn’t in our field.

It’s daunting to be out there and willing to work when people aren’t wanting to give chances to anyone they think might get bored. To anyone who may not be able to lift things. Who seem to have too demure a manner. Who haven’t worked sales in a few years. Who happened to have been terminated from their last position.

It’s a raging shit-storm out there, y’all.

It’s hard to deal with all of that. It’s hard to fight the anxiety and depression. It’s hard to keep the hope.

I have the benefit of a father who’s willing to help. A sister who is praying for me. A best friend who is supportive and understanding of my mood swings.

Then there are the other folks who don’t understand their words are dragging me down. I need people to have faith in me so that I can feel justified in having faith in myself.

I know that times are hard for everyone. I know that I cannot rely on others for everything.

I’m trying my hardest to put myself out there and get a job.

Negativity isn’t just words. It’s an attitude. Planning for failure is not something I feel I can do without drowning in despair. No one plans to fail. Trying to explain reality to someone in the deep end isn’t doing them a favor. “Hey you! You in the deep end! Did you know you’re in over your head and it’s raining? Hey! Maybe you should move to the shallow end! Don’t want you to drown or nothing! Help? No, no, no. Just wanted you to know you’re gonna drown if you don’t get moving.”

It’s kind of like that.

Negativity kills the spirit. Harping on facts can also kill the spirit. I don’t know why people cannot be spiritually supportive of others. I’ve noticed it more in some cultures. I’ve noticed it more in some cities. I’m choosing not to communicate to my people in those cultures and cities in order to keep my sanity.

Hope is a hard thing. Keeping it is harder.

Despair is an evil fucker. It lies. No one needs that.

Hug your loved ones and listen. If you don’t have a viable solution. Just let them know you support them. That’s all they want.

This limpy gal is tired but I’m tireless. I will keep trying. I will keep knocking the naysayers out of my way. Cause that’s what I do.

People survive everyday. They find ways. I will, too. Wish me luck, y’all.


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